Friday, December 30, 2005

Carol Burnette

I took a Greyhound from San Diego to the Beverly Hills station today. While waiting for Chateau to pick me up, I turned the corner onto Sunset Blvd., and BAM! I was walking on those famous star plaques. I didn't even have to look for them; they found ME.

My beloved star plaques! I'd waited so long to see you!! Especially YOU Carol.

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Happy Holidays from La Mesa, California!

This evening's sunset as seen from my front yard.

Pinch me.

So I had the strangest dream.

It all started with this traffic cone mobile that I had to make for design class. It was supposed to be a several week project, but for some reason I had to do it all in one day. I have no idea why.

Once that was all taken care of, these strange glam rockers started screaming absurdities at me along with half of the creative track.

The next thing I knew, two crazy blondes kidnapped me and drove me all the way to California.

Upon arrival, I was instantly taken to my grandparents house to celebrate my aunt's birthday.

While there I discovered that my aunt had an affinity for fine fragrances...

...that I had a new cousin named Alex...

...that my kid cousins were on their way to becoming pro skateboarders...

...and that llamas were also present at Jesus' birth.

Then I was transported to San Diego's finest mall: Horton Plaza.

My best friend in high school Bethany was there, and she helped me pick out some Christmas gifts for my family.

Later Erica appeared in the Gaslamp to give me the "super bird."

Latin hip-hop group Ozomatli joined in the fun.

Before my ears could stop ringing, Dad started telling us the Christmas story.

Samuel started thinking he was Samuel the Lamanite, prophesying of Christ's birth.

And Scott read us a bedtime Christmas story.

Once the nephews went to bed, Sasha and Scott broke the news to me that Santa Claus is a phony. After the tears, they had the audacity to ask me to help them be Santa. We stayed up very late making a trampoline.

For some reason Christmas was in Escondido.

Then we had Christmas again in La Mesa.

Just when I thought my dream couldn't get any longer, all these old high school friends started filing into my house to visit. I was sick on the floor in pain, but they wouldn't leave.

Finally I pinched myself and realized it wasn't a dream at all. Life would be like this always if school didn't get in the way.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

From a car-seat in a van

Today, on his fifth birthday, my nephew Brandon tells me that Santa Clause does not exist. What is going on with today's youth?

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Nessy the Long-neck Stapler

Today I needed a stapler.

Not just any household stapler; I needed one with an exceptionally long neck so that I could staple a CD booklet precisely without having to bend the pages. After having spent $22 on printing, I wanted my book to look legit.

I started at Cougar Creations. Why they don't have one of these very necessary binding devices escapes me. Then I tried the library where rumor had it that long-neck staplers exist. They don't. Next was the HFAC. I tried the graphic arts print lab, the photo lab, the visual arts lab. Nothing.

Then I spotted the crafty Jared Cardon on the fourth floor. Jared gets around. I asked him if he knew where I could find one of these devices. He thought back to his days working in the Harmon Building and proceeded to explain how a heavy-duty stapler lived in the most northern part of the second floor in the middle aisle of the cubicle section. At this point I really should have given up my hunt, but my perfectionistic, idealistic, illogical self was determined as ever to find the dang stapler.

I hiked up to the Harmon and started snooping sneakily around the cubicles for my prize. Then I discovered I was actually on the first floor. Duh. Once on the second floor I enlisted the help of the girl at the desk. She, of course, knew nothing but was happy to follow me as I followed Jared's directions through the cubicle maze.

So then Jared was wrong. There was no long-neck stapler. Luckily though a nice lady overheard our conversation and sent me up another floor to the associate dean's office. I was so totally excited that this women actually knew what I wanted that when I got to the dean's office I fully expected him to just hand over the stapler. No. I had to spend the next few minutes convincing the man pull the rarely-used device out from storage. He came back five minutes later with a big box. It turns out that my stapler didn't have a neck at all. Instead it was a huge ol' suspended, electronic, pedal-controlled thing-a-majigger. I'd never seen anything like it.

So tonight I turned my CD package in to Brent Barson. He mentioned something about liking it, which is rare for him. I was feeling very good about myself. After explaining to him about today's hunting adventure he started looking at me funny. "Why didn't you just use the stapler in OUR print lab?" he asked.

And that's when I started crying.

Monday, December 12, 2005

Cheers & Jeers

CHEER: Finding out that I am in the recent documentary "This Divided State."

CHEER: Going to BilliardEx in SLC with Katie and Chateau to take pictures for some ads.

CHEER: Going to the new Apple Store...first one in Utah.

CHEER: Randomly running into some beautiful ladies on campus singing Ben Folds 'round the piano.

CHEER: Jessica visiting from Delaware.

JEER: Snow.

JEER: Spending almost four hours trying to print my Beck greatest hits double CD package with no luck. (No, I'm still not done.)

CHEER: Going with Chateau to see world-renowned photographer SebastiĆ£o Salgado's refugee exhibit titled "Exodus."

CHEER: Christina throwing a Ramen party.

CHEER: The semester is almost over, and things are going well.

JEER: Except for the fact that I'm failing STAT 105.

Monday, December 05, 2005